A Trending Experiment With Falling In Love

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I figured if I was going to spend my time confronting this trending article(at least it seems to be trending on Facebook) on a few friend’s posts, I might as well make it official and transfer my thoughts into a blog before the CPU within me becomes worn of this subject, right?  Too bad!  I’m going to go ahead and do it instead of waiting for your response, haha.

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http://tinyurl.com/mmmd86p )

The woman who wrote about this experiment shared her perspective and her actual personal experience.  Her having a great personal experience with such an approach is fantastic, but not likely to create stable, long-lasting relationships the majority of the time in my mind for a few discomfiting reasons.

I honestly didn’t identify this experiment as anything too fascinating.  I say this simply because this article represented a nice realization that we can all feel close to each other as human beings, like we should all naturally do in the first place with each other, but barriers like societal assumptions, work and technology nourish the consequence, i.e., us all becoming very strange to each other. The more that worldly things take over our lives (like technology), the more amazing it will all seem when we partake in such an experiment as this, making it seem like we attain a much more profound connection with somebody else.

When I read this article, flashes of the animated movies “Frozen” and “Wall-E” came to mind.  “Frozen” came to mind because such a process reminds me of when the little sister is pretty much cooped up in the castle most of her life trying to reach out to her older sister, and then once they have this grand even at their castle, when she talks with the first guy who gives her obvious attention, she instantly falls madly in love with him, simply because he’s charismatic and they have a couple things in common, not to mention she has focused most of her life on her sister which makes their meeting seem so much more intense. This last reason is why I think of “Wall-E” as well.  All those silly humans planting their faces on those screens 99.99% of their lives, being consumed only by the technology right in front of their noses, that when they finally look away(to another human being for example), what they see and experience seems wildly and overwhelmingly grand.

I think the more our word develops, the more shocking such reactions will become and it will come to a point where we’ll crave it so badly and think it’s so super special that we automatically think it’s falling IN love or TRUE love.  I think it’s awesome how this psychologist helps people realize everyone else is just as deep as themselves, helps us care about each other through the opportunities of developing compassion for them, but I don’t think these things equal true love/being in love. I see it as just respecting, accepting, and feeling for the human race as a whole, something basic that nearly all of us lack in some ways.

I’m definitely not partial to the idea that there is no very special connection between someone in love according to the one presenting this research. If it was truly special, it would be impossible to happen with anybody else, or at least very many people at all, at least in my views.  I’m also concerned with the placebo effect such an experiment can have on many people.  As many of us realize, when a product is hyped-up enough(especially when it comes to something as enticing and important as love), we can feel like we’re getting a high when in reality, we just got a needle full of diluted sugar.  The beauty of psychology!  We desire love to be sweet, but it indeed needs to amount to more than a sprinkle of sugar in our lives.

These are the reasons I think this experiment wouldn’t be very effective for long for most people.  In summary, I think this is more about our lack of general connectivity with the human race, and after that matter, it’s about whether or not being in love is truly special. If you believe it’s not very special at all, then you’ll likely believe it can happen with nearly every being we can lay eyes on.

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Once Again Commencing The Unknown

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“Not all who wander are aimless. Especially not those who seek truth beyond tradition, beyond definition, beyond the image.” – “Mona Lisa Smile”

Ever since I started looking for a new job and then found one, I haven’t written a blog post. Do I not have any time? No, that’s not really it. Do I lack inspiration or motivation because most jobs suck out your soul? Actually, no. I finally found a job that has meaning, what I’ve always wanted, and I love my job. Perhaps writing a blog seems a bit prosaic to me since I found something with great meaning? I don’t think that’s it either. I cherish writing, and it seems to not matter what I’m writing exactly, I still enjoy it to some degree. I find writing/typing very therapeutic and interesting. I actually have sort of an obsession with words if you ask me. English has always held a potent allure for me.

What is it then? For the past 3 months, I’ve dabbled in pondering this. Now, I’ve decided to give it another go instead of wondering, just self-administering a faint nudge. You don’t ever want to push yourself too much, I do believe in writing being as natural as possible when carried out. I almost convinced myself to write about the Adrian Peterson issue, how I feel that spanking your child with your hand or an item should be the last resort after attempting as many peaceful approaches as possible, how it should still be considered, that sometimes body parts just get in the way when there is struggle- sometimes resulting in an unintended mark which I even recall in my own memories, that a lot of people are being too harsh.

Though, I think doing a thorough sweep on the subject to be uninteresting at this point. Adrian Peterson’s issue became a tired one once the chilled sunrise of yesterday cast its light on my balcony. So, I’ll just leave my post like this with a dash of mystery and a ton of genuineness. Have I mentioned that I find the word “genuineness” a bit uncomfortable? Well, there you have it. Have a nice week! God Bless!

Dealing With Such An Ugly Pair

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Assumption and judgement, what a pair.  You could say that I consider them ugly cousins.  These are a couple of darknesses that seep out of so many of us.  I’d be curious to corral 1,000 random people of the world and inquire of them what their own personal definition of hate is.  I’d imagine that a handful of them would give me such deep answers or perspectives from intriguing angles to the point of giving me goosebumps.  That would be such a highlight.  Though, I’d also imagine most people giving me their definition and then witnessing a glimmer of false pride in their eyes as if no such thing seeps from them in the least. 

Hearing me say that people shouldn’t look at being wrong as a bad thing might make some people raise an eyebrow, but I hope the lot of you would agree.  Being wrong translates into you having the option to wipe your slate clean.  Wiping the slate clean doesn’t have to be this wildly life-changing event.  We should be and can be willing to wipe our slates clean repeatedly in numerous compartments of our lives.  You can’t build a building by just setting one fully built down on level ground, it has to be built brick by brick.  It makes me wonder why such a simple idea is surpassed as often as it is.

 Hate is usually in the smallest actions, the shortest sentences. A few of those a day from millions of people, and what do you have? The source of humanity’s decay. There will never be any peace in this world unless you search within yourself, yank all those nasty hidden leeches out of you and burn them with your passion and determination.  No, not hand them on over to your enemies, burn them.  People that have been eaten away to a greater extent need even further consideration, even further reflection.  
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Are You As Honest With Yourself As You Think?

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Some of you have likely been called a “sheep” on the internet or have seen somebody else feel the wrath of such a word.  While I promote individual thinking that is not so black and white and I promote the intention behind people who strive to assist in bringing this sort of thinking out of others… it’s probable that none of us are even correctly equipped to do so.

Not only do I have an issue with the fact that mere HUMANS are the ones assessing the worth of fellow humans, but I also have an issue with the ones who seem to have no desire whatsoever in building up their community, instead, tearing it down piece by piece, adding to the disaster.  How are they doing this?  They do this by adding a dash of condescension, a sprinkle of sarcasm, and a pinch ad hominem.  To put it simply, you cannot instill these poisons to your approach if you want to do any good.  This poison will overcome the good cause you believe you’re spreading all around.  Who desires to lay their hands on something dipped in poison?    I think we all can admit that we have never been “won over” by such a silly approach, sheep or no sheep.

Not only is it pointless and poisonous that we’re so cynical with others instead of looking inside ourselves further, we have to realize that yes, there is such a thing as “sheep”, but then there are also many people who go through such extremes of being “different” JUST so they aren’t comparable to something familiar.  With either path you take, you are susceptible to losing yourself in the process.   Maybe instead of losing yourself though, what you could actually be doing is finding yourself.  There is such a fine line.  We should delve into this even further.

Us humans are quite fond of sniffing out certain traits of each other, certain mannerisms, certain personal tastes to use against each other, just so we can corral everybody into our tiny labeled compartments so that it “all makes sense”.  Does it sincerely make sense that they “do this because they like this” or that they “are this so they must be this” because those statements are truths within themselves or is it just that they make sense because you shaped them to fit in your narrow compartment?  Let’s use some examples that are a bit more clear, “you’re a democrat so you must be ___”, “you live in Mississippi so you must think ___”, “you listen to this music so you must lack in ___”.   The main point of one person labeling another fellow human being a “sheep” is to make it known that this person is “brainwashed”.  I have to admit, I consider most of America to be severely brainwashed by the media and society, but “brainwashed” is a term that is pretty shapeless and could be taken to many great lengths.  Can “brainwashed” truly be defined?

So, this begs the question, if you were diagnosed with amnesia, were put in a room full of many different styles of clothing and a radio with thousands of varying CD’s beside it, could you honestly vow that you would pick out the exact same style of clothing you’re wearing now or the same exact music you listen to now?  Would you even have the same standards or limits that you possess right now?  This is what I think of when someone uses such shapeless words with such hostility, with such negativity, it’s all so hopeless.  Yes, they are merely words, but what I’m truthfully concerned about here is the person behind hostile words, phrases with ill intentions, what kind of character they possess or the deliberate actions they take in this world.  On a more personal level, the level that ties us all together, how are YOU useful in this society?

“We blame society, but we are society.” – Anonymous.

My Belated Farewell To 2013

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2013 has been probably the most interesting year, major changes, taking roots somewhere new would be at the top of that list. I have made so many friends internationally this past year & have learned so much about differing religions & cultures it’s mind-blowing. There have been minor changes in myself as well. I will forever be tweaking parts of myself. I will never change the core of who I really am but I believe in becoming the best ME. I’ve learned a lot more patience & have been trying really hard to not have a short temper which has been working somewhat.  These are my biggest weaknesses, but at least I’ve had highly noticeable success in one of these areas. God, my husband, & a lot of self-reflection are the biggest influences in bettering myself & making myself happy. I wish all of you growth, happiness, & peace this next year & every year after!  🙂

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Understanding possible reasons for some seemingly hateful Christians

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“The reason why the world lacks unity, and lies broken and in heaps, is, because man is disunited with himself.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

What troubles me & is difficult to admit for me since I believe in God is that from experience, the majority of people I come across who are filled with the most hate(seemingly) are people who call themselves Christians. It’s ironic & we need to fix it.  There could be many reasons why so much hate is in the atmosphere of my community & it’s not entirely the average individual Christian’s fault.  The media does a bang-up job in propelling negative stereotypes & being a major influence of what disunites humanity as a whole.

When it comes to mending something so crucial, or mending a mass, it’s always best to mend from the inside out.  If we don’t sincerely dig deep enough within ourselves, we’ll just continue recreating low-quality shells of ourselves.  We can be solid, intricately put together from nail, to frame, to roof, to plumbing, to furnishings.  We need this.  We ARE society.  Every single one of us is what’s wrong with society, just to varying degrees of error.  We don’t have to be Christian, Jewish, Atheist, or Muslim to do so, renewing the world through this.  Though, since my experience with a very large quantity of fellow Christians is how this post began, let’s analyze the possibilities of why my experience/opinion could have some solid truth to it.

The unique pressure.   Well, each of us are nowhere near perfect & we all have to deal with many sorts of pressures, but maybe the pressures on a Christian can be of a larger mass in certain aspects & not the sort of pressure non-believers or people with some other beliefs can really relate to which can weigh down the pressure even further.  We’ve all heard the cut & dry, “If you don’t accept God & Jesus into your heart, you will burn for all eternity.”.   I realize this can really give us Christians the overall feeling of doom, needing to perfect every facet of ourselves, & rushing to help save the souls of the ones we deeply care for by teaching the love of God.  Not many people in this world outside of certain communities have to fret about such an immense concept & the idea can really get to your head if you don’t approach things the right way & find peace through God.  This can lead to it all completely backfiring, causing chaos within us & emanating it into the atmosphere we share with everybody else.

Blurring the line between walking down a Godly path & acting exactly like God.  There is a difference between submersing yourself in a Godly atmosphere & then partaking in actions & thoughts that only God has a right to.  Yes, I’m speaking of being judgmental or condemning others.  It’s perfectly fine to notice a wrong in someone, a sin, & then steering away from it & praying for the person.  Heck, you can even walk right up to the person & explain why you are so uncomfortable, but be prepared if they are not ready to hear it & want nothing to do with what you believe or present to them.  This is where I notice many of us Christians not being able to let that go.  Sometimes we push & push(sometimes ending in frustration & name-calling) so much that they’re even more turned off by the idea of God & the Christian community than they were before you even started the conversation, or should I say CONVERTsation?  Haha.  😉  This is okay in one perspective, afterall, we’re just having great intentions & spreading God’s word, correct?  That’s not the problem though & this fact only nourishes the self instead of others.  The problem is the APPROACH itself, nothing more.

From what I recall of the Bible, when Jesus spread the word, he was very mild, approachable, humble, loving, peaceful, & understanding.  I often do not see a single one of these traits while a believer & non-believer are clashing in a conversation.  I’m sure God & Jesus also knew/know when a person is not ready to accept.  We are often told this all the time in church with receiving the gift of tongues for example, “You just have to be ready, it’s okay that you’re not ready yet, you will be ready soon.”.  Maybe we need to keep that in mind more when dealing with non-believers?

We’re so passionately devoted that we gush & overflow sometimes.   This is another example of a good thing & a no-so-good thing.  Being this way inspires ourselves & empowers ourselves.  In short, it makes us happy feeling God’s presence, being so thankful toward Him, & wanting the world to know how great He is.  Not only does this make US feel invigorated, but also those who relate to us in that way.  Imagine that you’re a teenage boy & have a best gal pal whose family is culturally-unique compared to what you’re used to & throws a big vivacious party for your gal pal all because she started her monthly for the first time & she wants you to come, of course.  Not only does her family celebrate her womanhood with such gaiety, they overdo it with all sorts of quirky games that have a theme loosely relating to her, um, event.  As a boy, you don’t really care about what is happening because in your mind this will never happen to you, it has nothing to do with you, it’s practically foreign.  You’re also an adolescent which in my point is representing the youth, the naivety, the seed that hasn’t sprouted.  The non-believer being the teenage boy, the believer being the teenage girl.

In other words, we can be very overwhelming which automatically turns certain people off obviously.  If that isn’t enough, if & when we witness someone commit a sin for the hundredth time while rolling around in their elation, we can end up projecting ourselves onto that person, as if they should fully know better.  When I say we’re “so passionately devoted”, I mean that we experience such great results in having a close relationship with God & doing things that make our Father happy, that when someone near us commits what we see as an atrocity, we can feel as if that person is in some way raining on our parade with their spit.  We are so used to our ways & know fully how good it can be, that we can see others as merely passing up the most amazing opportunity of their lives without even flinching, which can lead to some impulsive explosions from us.

Ok, so this information is nothing new for a lot of people.  My point here was simply to have this as a reminder for us all & having you guys see it through the tint of my lens specifically.  All of this just comes down to tolerance & working even harder at setting ourselves aside to let God take care of the details that are meant for Him alone.  Tolerance & love need to be more than just Band-Aids for us.  We as a human race(not just Christians) need to let tolerance & love mend us from the inside out till we are completely renewed.  With the help of God & our willingness to receive, absolutely anything is possible.  If you would like me to clear something up(maybe I worded something in an odd way that offended you or confused you), add to this post, or go further into detail with me with specific verses from the Bible, just type away in the comment section!   Thank you for letting me waste your time!  🙂